More Babies??

I never wanted a large family, just two kids a husband maybe a dog/cat and I would be happy. I didn't want 4/5 kids because it meant a bigger house, car and all that jazz. But after already having 2 kids at 19 it's made me rethink it a lot. I didn't want that chapter of my life to be over so young, but I definitely didn't want anymore babies in the near future either. I like even numbers and if I have more children it will be an even number of children - I mean what if you go to a theme park one will always be left out and not have a partner on rides if you have 3! And 3 kids across the back seat of even a big car is squashy so I would buy I bigger car anyway which would have room for four. It's scary though, to think I have had 4 pregnancies but I only have 2 beautiful babies on this earth - that's 50%. It scares me to think that if I want more children I could have to go through the heartbreak of another one or more miscarriages and this time it may not happen during the first trimester.. It's scary! My family doesn't feel complete yet, right now though i'm happy just being a mum of two. I need to finish my classes and get my life sorted a bit more before anymore babies come into this family. I also want to know that the next baby daddy is going to be my husband - for better or for worst. I'm not rushing into having another baby anytime soon i'm not ready but I know I want to have more children. I know that I still have got some more love to give and I want to have another baby with my husband when that time comes. I'm so thankful for the two boys I have on this earth with me and even though both my other babies where only little peanuts when they left I still wonder about them and love them everyday! I want to achieve a lot in my life, I have many hopes and dreams I want to make come true but deep down something inside me tells me that even if I fail and I can't achieve what I want to in life - that as long as i'm a mother, that I love, care and provide my children with everything I need i'll be happy and have lived a successful life.